How many more times will I have a cup with a handpicked flower on my window ledge?  How many more times will a kid come in, glowing with the knowledge that he has something behind his back that will make his mom smile?  Already, it's a little bit of a 'tongue-in-cheek' act, as though they're way too old to be doing such childish things.  They've graduated from dandelions -which I kind of miss, by the way- to the wild daisies that grow around our acreage in the denser bush.  The hands that hold them out are not chubby toddler fingers anymore, but capable pre-teen and teenager hands.
 It's hit me pretty hard lately … my kids really are growing up.  And no matter how hard I try to freeze time now, or slow it down, it seems to just keep speeding past.
I find myself trying to soak up my kids' every day now.  Some days its easier than others.  I dont claim to be a saint and am faaaaar from a perfect mom - I definitely dont have endless patience for the bickering that happens.  BUT -  It seems like I'm running out of time with them.  Today I took special care to remember details.



Brad is in SK with Dustin right now, he tagged along for an overnighter to go check a job site.  That left Zach and me here to hold down the fort.
It's a normal Thursday, only I told him we'll have a "date" since we were on our own for supper and the evening. We get groceries in the afternoon.  He chooses a watermelon for an extra summer snack around the pool this week, and bar-b-que chips.  He chooses Plain M&Ms for our treat with a movie this evening, and I dont even try to talk him into the Peanut ones.  He rides the end of the cart to the car, draping himself as a human tie-down over the precariously balanced bins I have in it (I hate Walmart carts for bins.  But I hate plastic bags even more, so we deal with bins balanced in carts) laughing that he's loosing his grip and there's no foot space on the underside.
We stop by Canadian Tire. He's talked me into letting him buy yet another soccer ball.  This is an insanely special one because it's the official FIFA colors.  We check the spot where there had been lots of them last week, only to find the shelf empty.  We track down an employee who goes to check the infamous 'back',  and he confidently tells me she will find one- because he just prayed.  He lets out a good loud  "YESSS!!!" when she comes around the corner carrying his treasure.  (Score another one for his child-like faith!) He's beaming and grinning all the way to the checkout.
Somehow he talks me into letting him pay me back for the ball with money, instead of the agreed on chores to work for it as we drive home.  He'll still help weed the garden tomorrow though, he tells me, because Brad's not home and he'll be bored anyway.  I agree.  I'm pretty sure he knows I'll forget to transfer the funds from his bank account, so the least he can do is help weed.
We arrive at home, he helps unload the groceries from the car, or the milk jugs anyway.  By the time he's done with those I've got the rest in the house…. then he grabs a teaspoon to share the melted edges from the ice cream we just bought (my mom always did this with me when I was little, and it seems I've taught my kids it too.  Soft and melted edges are the best!) and then he settles in to watch the sports channel.
Later, we go back into town and pick out a movie (Robo-cop) and he chooses where our "date" for supper will be.  He chooses McDonalds …  then Subway … or maybe Dairy Queen.  Then he rethinks  it and chooses McDonalds again, telling me not to let him change his mind ... and then he realizes he hasn't even considered A&W.  But he wants McDonalds.  Until we start driving.  Then he flops back to A&W, telling me to forget that he told me he wasn't allowed to change his mind.  This is the only time I've ever been grateful Steinbach does not have more choice for fast-food; we may never have eaten if it did.
He insists he wants fries and not onion rings, and then eats all of my onion rings.  He claims he's starving when I ordered him the 3 piece chicken strip meal (he wants the 5) and then brings home half of the 3 piece meal because he's full.

He tells me about FIFA World Cup during supper.  How Spain won the entire games last time, but surprisingly, was out in the first round this time.  How Brazil lost horribly to Germany, and how sad it was to see Brazil so upset.  I learned that one player (forgive me, he told me the name and I forget now) was taken out of the games and suspended from anything relating to soccer for 4 months for biting another players shoulder.  We agree that biting should only be something toddler still do.  He tells me  another is recovering from a fractured vertebrae from a knee hitting his back, and I silently add Professional Soccer Player the list of careers I don't want my boys in.  I learn the average distance a soccer player runs during a full game is close to 10 kms.  I learn a lot from my 10 year old about soccer this evening.

We come home again, movie in hand, and decide to get outside settled for the evening before starting it.  He tells me he'll help cover the pool and water the flowers and garden.  After the pool is covered, he becomes moral support rather than help, choosing to snuggle his beloved cats instead.  He tells me Big Mama must be expecting kittens, she's much heavier than she's ever been - and I actually do think she may be, she does seem rounder.  He tells me he needs to get something from the garage and hands me Big Mama telling me not to put her down, she needs snuggling, and he isnt done.  So I stand there by the garden, swarmed by mosquitoes, and realize I'm rocking a pregnant cat as though she were a baby herself - because my kid told me to.  It makes me smile.
He returns - not sure what he got because he's empty handed- and takes back Big Mama.  He asks (again) how many kittens we'll keep if she really does have a litter.  And (again) we talk about the chances of there being longer haired ones like she is.  And orange ones.  He wants orange ones.

We I finish watering, and he finishes snuggling and we head in for our movie.  We decide to watch in my room because it's more comfy in bed.  The previews aren't even finished and he's asking for M&Ms.  I tell him to wait a bit, we just had a big supper.  He asks what's in Dad's and my secret stash in the headboard compartment, and I realize it's not a secret stash anymore.  I give him the M&Ms.

The movie ends and we agree it was pretty good.  We text with Dustin and Brad a bit and then he goes and gets his ipod and plays a game beside me while I edit photos.  Before we know it, it's 9:50pm and well past bedtime.

And now I sit here and type this, thinking that it's yet another day gone by with him.  Chances are he wont remember it, it was just a typical day really.  But I hope I will.

I love you, Zachary.